2012.

It's 2012.
Unlike most people, I did not spend new year's out partying.
Instead, I spent it curled up at home with a giant blanket.
I've been in a horrible, sad mood these past few days. My family and my friends assumed it was because of my news years plans. Or lack of them.
But that's the thing. I don't care about whether I stay at home or not, because I don't like partying. I wouldn't have minded staying home with a couple friends, but everyone wanted to go out and party. So i stayed home.
Either way. My sadness has nothing to do with new years.
I just feel so confused.
I don't know what I'm doing with my life. I wish I did. I wish I could just shut my eyes, open them after a few minutes and be hit with the answers to life's hardest questions.
But I can't do that.
I'm so sick of hiding. Pretending I'm someone I'm not. Caring about what people think. I'm so sick of feeling guilty because my life is perfect, and I'm still unsatisfied.
So it's currently 1 am. January 1st.
I'm not going to do this anymore.
I'm not gonna sit around wondering why I'm not satisfied. Wishing for things I've lost. Mooning over a lost love. Crying over betrayal.
I refuse to do that.
This year, a new Kim is going to be born. One that won't fall in love. One that won't get hurt. One that won't get kicked when she's down. One that won't trust as easily as she did.
The new Kim isn't gonna take shit from anyone.
Not like I do. Correction - did.
No, this year marks the start of something new. Something stronger.

Big Bounce Shadows.

I went to MAC today. Last time I was there, I noticed their Big Bounce Shadows and I really wanted one.
I ended up buying two, though.
The Cool Elite, a pearly white with a shimmery finish.
Extra Charged, a dark olive green with blue shimmery bits.

They're not that big. They're decent sized. Bigger than MAC's powder eyeshadows but smaller than say, their blush. Around the same size as their paint pots.

I hadn't really bothered swatching, or even opening them in the store, because I was in such a hurry. So I just grabbed them, paid and left. 

So when i got home and opened them, I was surprised at how... pretty they looked. I didn't wanna dip my brush in them! They looked good enough to be eaten. (Well, not literally.)

Extra Charged

The Cool Elite

Once I swatched them, though, I was terribly disappointed. I found the formula far too thin and it looked extremely washed out. It took several layers for the colours to actually show. And considering my skin colour, it looked even more washed out.

Here it is with just one layer.

Couple more layers.

  

The only way to apply this would be with a brush. Using your finger sis extremely messy, product gets everywhere and slips and slides all over your lid, causing uneven coverage.

As you can see, applying this with simply one layer is not enough, as it hardly shows up. 

Overall, I was extremely disappointed in them.
In my opinion, it was a waste of money, and I would have been better off buying MAC Paint Pots.
It's a real shame, because the colours are beautiful and I love the shimmery shades.

Procrastinating my life away?

Failure of a day.
Today, I woke up at noon. Something I never do, because I think sleeping away at least four hours of your life in the morning, when you could be doing something productive, is a waste. When you could just do that sleeping at night instead of staring into space and letting thoughts eat at your brain. But I guess that's hypocritical of me to say, because that's exactly what I do. Oh well.
Instead of getting down to studying because I woke up so late, which would have been ideal for me to do considering the limited amount of hours I had left for this day to end, I procrastinated. I spent over an hour  eating breakfast, tearing away bits of bread and staring at them like bread was the most interesting thing on the planet.
After that, I attempted studying. Didn't concentrate much, though. Next thing I new, the whole day had passed by and I'd barely got anything done.
Waste of a day, I know.

Winter

Sometimes, I really don't like living in India. Winter is one of those times. It never snows in Mumbai. Normally one would find that amazing, and most people do. But sometimes a year long summer gets tiring. Plus, I've never even touched snow. How sad is that? So I decided to create some snowy makeup to cheer myself up! This is me as an ice queen.

And here are some snowy lips I created -

Hope you liked them! Comment and share :) P.s. I have some Christmas designs coming up.

heartbreak in a nutshell.

I hate love. I'm absolutely serious. That juxtaposition of words is completely true. Love has done nothing but turn my life upside down. Mess it up. Ruin it. Bowl me over.

 I remember what life was like before I fell in love. It was so simple and uncomplicated. I remember worrying about who my latest crush was texting, or what the most "in" hairstyle was, or something trivial and fun like that. But the second he walked into the room, all confidence and smirks, I knew I was done for. I knew he'd be bad news, but something inside me just refused to let him walk out of the room without knowing who I was.

It wasn't love at first sight, no. I don't believe in that. But it was love in first talk. I remember the first time he opened his beautiful lips (I'm not trying to be cheesy. They really were beautiful.) and said hello to me. It was like dying and being reborn - I'm not over-exaggerating, although it sure sounds like it, it sounds so silly when put down in words - and I'm quite sure I took over ten seconds to respond. I was nervous and fumbly. I most probably sounded like a total dork. But despite all that, he didn't run away screaming "OMG, she's weird!" so I guess I wasn't all that bad that night.

As we got closer over the months, my feelings kept building up until the point where it felt like my heart was about to burst into song. I remember someone telling me he was with someone else. I remember the shock I felt. I remember crying in a school bathroom stall, simply because he was with someone that was not me. I remember watching him from a distance for so long. Wishing he loved me. Not whatsherface.
I remember finding out it was a lie. He was never dating anyone! I remember the smile I had on my face that day. My love for him bloomed again.

Eventually I began dating him. but even then, I knew it was unrequited. He didn't love me like I loved him. Not even close. He cared for me, yes. But never loved me. Nevertheless, I appreciated his presence. Just having him around was enough for me.

He was amazing. I loved him so much, I was willing to do anything for him. If he'd called me up in the middle of night, I'd be willing to drop everything just to help him out. My friends used to shake their heads at me, tell me I was making a bad decision. They said I shouldn't be with him. They said I love him far too much, and that he didn't deserve it. "He's a player, Kim!" "He's going to rip your heart out."  "What is wrong with you? Don't fall in love with him!"
I didn't care. Not one bit. To me, he was... the ultimate. I didn't care what everyone said. He meant more to me than all my friends combined, and I care for my friends a lot.
So I didn't listen to them. No, instead. I defended him. I said he was capable of love. That they were judging him far too quickly. I lost a friend, too, along the way. I used to get angry when people said hurtful things to me about him, about how he didn't love me. I used to freak out, hit them too, sometimes. So I lost a friend. But I didn't care! He meant more to me than them. I was convinced that he wasn't the person that everyone said he was. I'd spent months getting to know him, and trying ti peel away his many layers. I'd been successful in peeling off many. And the more he let me in, the more I fell in love with him, because they were wrong. Everyone was wrong. He was beautiful. I loved him more than ever.

I remember how our relationship started it's downward spiral. I remember going days without meeting him and how that drove me crazy. I remember how he got distant, far to distant for me to handle. I remember our million fights and breakups, and how I just couldn't let go of him like I knew I should. I remember my depression, my sadness, my anger, my problems. I remember when we broke up for the final time, and how it crushed me when I realized that this was it. He was gone. I remember just how sad I was then. 'Sad' doesn't even come close to describing how I felt, then. Empty, broken, hollow, desperate. Yearning. Yearning for someone I lost - someone I never really had, no matter what I tell myself. He was never really mine.

Looking back now, I realize how I did not appreciate him as much as I should have. I wish I'd taken a snapshot of every moment we had together and locked it up in a special place in my head. I know that I will probably be in a serious relationship again in the future. I know I will find someone else, possibly someone better. But he will always be my first, and most importantly, my only love.

Caroline Costa

I was browsing videos on youtube, and I discovered 'Caroline Costa'.
She seems to be some sort of teen pop star. I tried googling her but everything about her was in french - which led me to assume she was french.
Either way, I think she has a fantastic voice. :]
Check her out on youtube.

Forest Inspired.

Eric Northman is my one love.

Isn't he simply drool-worthy?

True Blood fans will like this. :)

Angry Birds! :)

I feel so silly for not uploading this earlier! This is nearly two months old!
I'm so forgetful sometimes.

Anyway, hope you like!

Vampyre Nails ;)

Yes, i'm currently on a Vampyre high.

Vampyre Inspired Lips

What I imagine a Vampyre would wear on her lips ;)

Halloween

Just a look I created for Halloween. It's quite old, I know. I'd forgotten to upload it.
Hope you like!

Corset Inspired.

Corsets have always fascinated me. They're so... feminine, And Victorian. And awesome.
SO here is some Nail Art I did, inspired by corsets. :]

Love me some violet glitter!

Zebraaa print.

Love me some nail art. :D

Tigerrr print ;)

What's sexier than Tiger Print?

Tiger Print on my lips. ;)

Comment with some lovee :*

Watermelon kiss.

Hello my lovelies :)
I have another lip art for you. Hope you like it -

German

I'm starting to love studying the German language.
I wish I could continue next year.

Ich liebe Deutsch!

Whataaawhaat??

My dog amuses me.

Busy doing nothing.

I'm sorry I haven't been posting much.
I'm starting to have a really tough time, lately. My mind is really busy, but I'm not doing anything productive. When I should be.
I used to be so confident about life and myself and what I was supposed to do, but now I just feel lost, distracted and unmotivated.
My brain seems to have switched off, as well. I should be using my time to study but instead I'm being consumed by thoughts that don't make sense half of the time.
Anyway, the point of this rant was just to apologize for being MIA most of the time. I hope I haven't lost any followers because of my lack of posting.
I really hope you will understand.
I promise I will try to get my life back on track soon, and you will get your posts again. Soon. Hopefully. :]

Disaster.

WHo lives in a pineapple under the sea?!
Spongebob Squarepants!
Porous and yellow and spongy is he!
Spongebob Squarepants!
Spongebob Squarepants.
Spongebob Squarepants.
Spongyyybooob Squarepaaaants!!

Du du du du du du du duuu.

Okay, now I have depressed myself.
Would you like to know why?
Probably not. But I shall tell you anyway.

I created Spongebob nails. They were so amazing, I wanted to throw my hands in the air and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAUTIFUL NAILS, WORLD!"
And I was totally prepared to do that.

....But then the most horrific of all things possible happened.

This seemingly innocent pot of white nail paint was sitting on my desk. In my happiness, I swung my hands around, admiring the beauty that was my nails.
Bad decision.
Distaster.
One moment, my world is filled with Spongebob and beauty and all things wonderful.
Next moment?
A bloodcurdling scream is being wrenched out of my mouth as time freezes and earth stops spinning. In slow motion, I watched as my hand knocked over the pot. I watched as it sailed through the air, streams of nail paint flying everywhere, staining my floor, my thighs, my cell phone, and.. last of all.. My nails.
Oh, the horror.

Painstaking effort put into the minute details of Spongebob's face... gone.
Useless.
Disappeared.

It felt like the end of the world.
Maybe it was. Who knows? Maybe I'm currently living in a whole other reality, one where Spongebob forgives me splattering his lovely face with white paint.

Oh, how I wish I was.

But no. I'm still in this world.
One where I shall forever be hated by Spongebob and his dishwashing minions.

Why me?

(This is where you break into sobs and hope that Spongebob is listening. Hopefully your tears shall cause him to empathize with me and cause him to therefore decide to forgive my error.)

...One can only hope.

Back-To-School Nails

I was looking through my posts, and yknow what I realized? That I hadn't posted my back-to-school nails!!
I was so shocked I burst out laughing.
These were possibly the favorite nails I'd ever created.
I created them less than a month ago, just in time for my first day back in school.
You can bet that everyone loved it!

Thumb - side of a schoolbus
Forefinger - converse, because those are what i wear to school!
Middle finger - apple, because everyone is secretly a teachers pet ;)
Ring finger - whiteboard :D
Pinky - back of a pencil!

I hope everyone had a smooth transition from summer to school! I know I did.

App Inspired Nails - Tutorial.

1. Start with a base coat.

2. Then, paint all your nails white. This causes the other colors to show up brighter.

3. Paint your forefinger a light blue.

4. Paint your middle finger and thumb green.

5. Paint your ring finger orange.

Base colors all done.

6. Now for the design. Draw a white rhombus on your forefinger. Sorry, I have no picture because I just realized the picture is blurry.

7. Next, paint an 'S' in light blue. This is the finished 'Skype' app nail.

8. Next we will do the 'Phone' app nail. Pain the shape of a phone on your thumb. Simplest way to do so - first paint a short diagonal line. Then, draw two squares on either end.

9. Paint a red dot on the top right corner of your thumb.

10. Draw the number "1" in the center of the red circle. (Forgot to take a picture of it - sorry.) This is the finished 'Phone' app nail.

11. Make a large oval on your middle finger. Draw little line from the bottom left side, pointing left.

12. Red dot and the number '1'. This is the finished 'Messages' app nail.

13. Draw an ipod on your ring finger.
- Draw the outline of a rectangle.
- Draw a smaller rectangle inside it, at the top.
- Draw the outline of a circle below that.
- Fill in the gaps, leaving the circle and small rectangle orange.
- Make a smaller white circle inside the orange circle.
This is the finished ipod nail!

14. Paint the top bit of your pinky nail red. Paint only 1/3 red, not half.

15. Write 'Mon' on the red area in white, and write the number '5' on the white area in black. This is the finished 'Calender' app nail. (I'm sorry it's so blurry. My camera was refusing to focus!)

16. Add a top coat to protect your nail design from chipping and to add a glossy shine, and you're all done!

Here are the finished nails:

Tell me if you liked this tutorial, and if you want more tutorials in the future?

Quick Post - Broken Nail

I broke a nail!

Breaking a nail is my worst fear.
Mostly because my nails take years to grow.

It's like snail mail.... but snail nail instead.

Does anyone have any suggestions to help my nails grow faster? I don't exactly like my nails looking te way they do right now -

But I don't want to cut my other nails short either.

Rainbows! #3

I never did see a rainbow.
But instead of being all doom and gloom - I've had enough of that, honestly - I decided to, once again, make my own rainbow.
I'm positive that at this point, you're wishing the sky would start producing rainbows already, so I'd quit my cosmetic-rainbows?

Not a chance.
My cosmetic-rainbows shall always make an appearance on this blog, despite how many rainbows I see... Because they've kinda grown on me, yknow?

Plus, like I've said so many times before - rainbows are my love.

Here they are.

I made a seven-colour rainbow this time, as opposed to my pervious rainbow nails which simply had three colours. To be honest, I got lazy there.

Shoes I Desperately Want.

Steve Madden's Traisie Blue Suede Platform Pumps.
I love them so much.
They're also surprisingly comfortable, I tried them on at the store. Unfortunately, I had to tear myself away from them, because I really don't think I need another pair of shoes.
Despite how absolutely beautiful they are.

Next one are these.

Hottopic's Red Animal Print Platform Heels
Ive wanted these for so long, and they're finally on clearance!

Hopefully these shall be mine very soon.